


the universe made manifest

by pearwaldorf



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Gen, Movie: Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Teacher-Student Relationship, and its possible interpretations, too many feelings about the Jedi Code
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-22
Updated: 2016-01-22
Packaged: 2018-05-15 12:12:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5784880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pearwaldorf/pseuds/pearwaldorf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Luke opens his eyes but makes no other acknowledgement that she’s gotten up. Sometimes she thinks she might get more reaction from the rocks or the grass, for all the feedback she’s gotten these long weeks. And suddenly, like a bowl overfull, that’s just--it. </p>
<p>“I can’t do this. I quit.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	the universe made manifest

**Author's Note:**

> "I will tell you a great secret, Captain. Perhaps the greatest of all time. The molecules of your body are the same molecules that make up this station, and the nebula outside, that burn inside the stars themselves. We are starstuff. We are the universe made manifest, trying to figure itself out. And as we have both learned, sometimes the universe requires a change of perspective."
> 
> \--Delenn, Babylon 5

Rey is used to hard work. She had to be, to climb through old ships, pull out rusted and stuck parts, and haul them to the Outpost if she wanted to keep herself fed. It is a skill that remains useful here on Ahch-To, the way she and Luke must fend for themselves still. Here she digs in the dirt to help grow their food, cuts and stacks the funny-smelling moss they burn for fuel, runs up and down those endless stairs until she thinks she might actually die. (She can’t tell if Luke is joking when he says he used to carry his old master on his back while doing the same thing.) 

The physical tasks do not bother her. The meditation, however, is agonizing. It’s different from sitting by herself, dreaming of far-off adventures or a family she doesn’t remember but hopes to find one day. _Empty your mind_ , he says, like it’s easy to ignore an itch on her nose or wonder, for the umpteenth time that day, if Finn has woken up yet. _There is no passion, there is serenity_ ; she keeps repeating, as if saying it enough will make it true. (It does not.) 

Her calf cramps from sitting too long and she hisses, staggering to her feet. Luke opens his eyes but makes no other acknowledgement that she’s gotten up. Sometimes she thinks she might get more reaction from the rocks or the grass, for all the feedback she’s gotten these long weeks. And suddenly, like a bowl overfull, that’s just--it.

“I can’t do this. I quit.” She figures she’ll ask Chewbacca to take her… somewhere. Back to D’Qar, maybe. She could still be useful to the Resistance as a mechanic. And it would allow her to stay with Finn. The Resistance would probably find a former stormtrooper to be an asset. Or they could hitch a freighter to the Outer Rim, disappear together like he asked her to, what seems like a long time ago now. 

Luke is still staring at her, but there’s something different in his expression. Frustration, possibly. Or defeat, maybe. She walks out of the meditation hut, intending on packing up her things, few as they are. Passing the garden, she notices she’s missed some weeds. She supposes she should at least leave it as tidy as she can before she goes.

The act of weeding, setting the garden in order, is soothing. She regrets she won’t see her plants grow strong and hearty, leaves reaching towards the sky. With a pang, she realizes she’ll have to leave her little flower bed in the corner too. But it can’t be helped.

A pair of hands appears next to hers, yanking out another weed. She and Luke work in silence for a little bit, until the row is clear. He sits back, but doesn’t cross his legs as usual. He draws his knees up, and it makes him look younger, less assured than she’s used to. She doesn’t know how she feels about this.

“It’s been too long since I’ve had a student. That’s not an excuse.” He sounds embarrassed, a little regretful. “And in my lack of practice, I’ve fallen back on old patterns, ones that may not necessarily be helpful for your learning. I’m sorry about that. If you want to still go, I won’t stop you, but I hope you’ll give an old man another chance?” He sounds tired now, and she thinks about how long he’s kept himself here, trying to atone for one mistake. She finds the anger and frustration that was previously there is just… gone, like water into the ground. 

“I think I can do that.” He smiles, and gets to his feet. Following him, she expects to go back to the meditation hut, but he takes her to an older part of the ruins. She can feel the history here, the presence of the many Jedi who must have trained and meditated within these walls. 

“I thought a change in perspective might be helpful,” he says. She nods, walking around the perimeter. Something tugs at the edge of her awareness, drawing her towards a pile of rubble. There’s a stone tablet, mostly buried, and she pulls it out carefully. 

“Can you read this?” She asks Luke. He nods, frowning in concentration as he puzzles out the ancient language. He laughs softly, shaking his head. 

“What is it? I don’t understand.” 

“Apparently I didn’t either. Not at all.” He translates the tablet for her.

_Emotion, yet peace._  
_Ignorance, yet knowledge._  
_Passion, yet serenity._  
_Chaos, yet harmony._  
_Death, yet the Force._

“‘Yet’,” he says. “That makes all the difference.” He looks at her, fond and proud in a way he’s not done before. “It appears I still have things to learn.”

“Does that mean I can call you Padawan?” She asks impishly. 

He shakes his head, smiling. “Those braids look silly on everybody. I’d prefer not.” 

**Author's Note:**

> There are two canonical versions of the [Jedi Code](http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Jedi_Code). I think very different conclusions can be drawn depending which one you structure your life by.


End file.
